S & M Man

Tune: The Candy Man

Who will run through jaggers,
Ripping up his flesh,
And turn right around,
And repeat the bloody mess?

CHORUS::
The S&M man,
The S&M man,
The S&M man because he mixes it with love,
And makes the hurt feel good.
The hurt feel good.

Who can take a hammer,
Shove it up her twat,
Move it back and forth,
Til he finds her G-spot,

Who can take a hammer,
Wave it overhead,
And slam it on his pecker,
Til he wishes he were dead?

Who can take his bicycle,
Take away the seat,
Put his girlfriend on it,
Ride her down a bumpy street?

Who can take some sandpaper,
Gotta be 50 grit,
Rub it back and forth,
Til she has a bleeding clit?

Who can take an old wood saw,
Rusty, but still cuts,
Saw it back and forth,
Til he cuts off both his nuts?

Who can take his willy,
Slam it in a door,
Slam it back and forth,
Til he can't pee anymore?

Who can take a chainsaw,
Rev it up on high,
Shove it up her arse,
Just to hear her scream and sigh?

Who can take a razor,
And no shaving cream,
Scrape her pussy bald,
While he listens to her scream?

Who can take a sander,
Make sure it's Black and Decker,
Rub it up and down,
Until you've got a bleeding pecker?

Who can take a mallet,
Claim that he's a stud,
Smash it on his pecker,
Till it starts to ooze blood?

Who can take a young girl,
Turn the lights down low,
Flip on the video camera,
And make like Rob Lowe?

Who would use machinery,
To masturbate at work,
Rip off his left testis,
And pretend it didn't hurt?

Who can take some fiberglass,
Wrap it round his pud,
Shove it up her arse,
Til she's shitting chunks of blood?

Who can take a light bulb,
Shove it up her arse,
Fuck her up the rear,
Til she's shitting chunks of glass?

Who can take just two bricks,
Take one in each hand,
Bang them on his balls,
Like the cymbals in the band?

Who wears pants with zippers,
And no underwear,
Then pulls them up and down,
And rips out his pubic hair?

Who can take a bottle,
Shove it up your ass,
And hit it with a hammer,
And line your ass with glass?

Who can take your scrotum,
Stick it with a pin,
Hang on a bunch of weights,
Till it drags down to your shins?

Who can take a chainsaw,
Cut the bitch in two,
Fuck the bottom half,
And toss the other half to you?

Who can take your penis,
Feed it to a whore,
Then slam it in a door,
So you can't fuck no more?

Who would take a condom,
Put pepper in the ring,
Use it on the wife,
'Cause she twitches when it stings?

Who can take your penis,
Tie it in a knot,
Tighter yet tighter,
Until the fucker rots?

Who can take two ice picks,
Stick one in each ear,
And ride her like a Harley,
While he fucks her up the rear?

Who takes jumper cables,
Clamps one on each tit,
Starts up the car,
And electrocutes the bitch?

Who would take your kiddies,
Out to a picnic binge,
Put them on the fire,
And watch the fuckers singe?

Who would put a kid's hand,
In a socket on the wall?
It's nice when they jerk,
Up against his balls?

Who gives children candy,
Takes them round the block,
And rips up their innards,
With the ramming of his cock?

Who can take a chainsaw,
Stick it up her hole,
Turn it round & round,
And make tuna casserole?

Who can take some clothes pegs,
Hang his girlfriend by her nipples,
Leave the bitch just hanging,
Til her tits are nearly tripled?

Who can take a Doberman,
Let him do a show,
Let him fuck your girlfriend,
While he takes a video?

Who can take a hair curler,
Turn it up on high,
Stick it in her cunt,
And listed to her fry?

Who can take his penis,
Put it in a door,
Slam it real hard,
And scream MORE MORE MORE?

Who can find some newlyweds,
Sneak into their room,
Fuck the bride in bed,
And sodomize the groom?

Who can take a glass rod,
Shove it up his prick,
Put it on the table,
And smash it with a brick?

Who can take a baby,
Throw it on a pile,
And fuck it up its ass,
Sish-ka-bob style?

Who can take a nun,
Lean her over the pew,
Fuck her up the ass,
'Till she wishes she was a Jew?

Who can take a vagina,
Suck out all the yeast,
Spit it out into some dough,
And serve bread at the hash feast?

Who can take a puppy,
Hold it by the ears,
Fuck it in the ass,
Until it sheds those puppy tears?

Who can take a vice clamp.
Clamp it on a tit
Squeeze the succker down
Till it pops just like a zit?

Who can take a transient
Rip out one of his eyes
Skull fuck the bastard
While he listens to his cries?

Who can take a Coke bottle
Shove it up her ass
Kidney punch the bitch
Until she's shitting blood and glass?

Who can take a cheese grater
Strap it to his arm
Fist fuck the bitch
And make vagina parmesian?

SONG ENDERS:

Who can take a baby,
Lay it on a bed,
Turn the bugger over,
Fuck the soft spot in its head?

Who can take a pregnant woman,
Fuck her til she's dead,
Leave his dick inside her,
Til the fetus gives him head?

Who can go to the abortion clinic,
Sneak around the back,
Root around the dumpster,
And find a tasty snack?

Who can take a little girl,
Before she's on the rag,
Fuck her till she's dead,
And then toss her in a bag?